Why adults date other marrieds?
Chat about a loaded topic that no one wants to chat about, this is it. Funny thing, affairs have been going on since the beginning of the world. Extramarital affairs can be filled with evils, cause sadness, and other troubles. Also you have to wrap your maind around all the other issues, there’s that truth and openness thing, money, age dissimilarity, religious upbringing, guilt, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this article I should classify an affair as a long term, maybe decades long relationship of a sexual nature between two individuals of whom one or both are married to other persons, married dating.
Why do women have extramarital affairs? There are as many reasons as there are seek an extramarital affair. I think mostly though it is just the human condition, the need for liking, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and loved. Here are a several reasons I have run across.
Physically we as humans are all sexual beings. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is enjoyable and exciting, and sex makes us get away the real world for a small period of time. This excitement exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Someone are able to switch the craving on and off, some are excellent at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and elder, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the hunt. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another human being, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These needs and yearnings can be so strong they prevail over the taboos the world has erected against extra-marital affairs. For lots of people the yearnings will beat their doubts and make them risk the anger of not only their family, but the public also. So why, what is the method?
Sex Addicts, perhaps some of us are. Sex is very good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically driven sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not harm your spouse or anyone else? You would need to lessen the risk you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is beneficial to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the largest grouping, very big in fact. There are many couples whose marriage is over, but they are happy in the way they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your spouse but there is no romance. Also there are the kids to look after. Your funds are so knotted. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to be together besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them completing the sex operation, at least not with their spouse. An affair occasionally solves the problem while keeping the marriage whole.
Ignoring, sadly this is a ordinary cause I fear. One or the other, as a rule the male is sexually neglecting his woman for a large humber of reasons. As a male I really am thankful to you guys neglecting your wives and making them available to us men of romance, making them “lonely wives” But I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just missing in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Perhaps its romance that is missing, maybe it is a shortage of love, maybe caring is disappeared, could be it is the closeness, maybe neglect. Maybe we have just developed distantly, our relulas interests diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is contradictory of what you want. Maybe I simply don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that feeling that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The ultimate reason people give is, they look for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to escape, for financial gain, for vengeance and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.